God Changed my Life

My name is Julia Turner and I am only 15 years old, yet I have already gone through

such a change in my life just in the last year.

I was born and raised in a roman catholic home where we attended church (which is

still attend but only once in a while) And since I was in kindergarten until gr.8 I

attended a roman catholic school. I grew up in this small school with all my close

friends like a family learning about God, but because it was around me everyday...it

didn't mean anything to me. So as I attended this school, though we had religion

every morning...I was growing further and further from God. It got so bad, that only

last year was I walking to the church at our school, refusing to go to

reconciliation because I thought it was dumb and I would curse at the Lord and say

horrible horrible things that sadden my heart now. I didn't think it was "cool" to

be catholic in a catholic school! well sure enough the year that I was furthest from

God was that year...and the year of my break down...the year of my depression. I was

so far in the pit I lost all hope..I was drinking and not coming home for days on

end. I lost all touch with my parents who lost all trust in me. I was always out at

the parties with older guys, I was always the one who got drunk every

weekend..though I didn't do drugs..I did something that was probably worse. One

night I was home along after another fight with my parents, and I had locked myself

in my room. I got up and went to the kitchen and cleared the medicine cabinet and

took the vodka from the counter..and I went to my room and took pills upon pills, I

cant even remember if I drank. After at least 3 different sets of pills with at

least two or three of each, I broke down...I cried and cried just sitting on my

floor shaking, I couldn't control it. I was so scared from what I had just done to

myself I couldn't think straight, I was getting so tired all of a sudden but I

didn't want to sleep cause I was afraid. I ended up passing out on the couch in my

basement later that night.

I hadn't changed even after that night, I still continued on with my normal

life..yet there was something always haunting me about that night. And I ended my

school year..which was the end of that school (gr. 8) still in deep deep depression

not letting anyone know-not getting any help.

I started at a knew school this year...still the same person, and I'm so glad I went

to this school because it changed my life forever. This time it was a public school

and I thought everyone was going to be just like me, I was surprised to see so many

Christians. at first I didn't really care and didn't pay much attention at all, but

I soon became friends with one of my very best friend now, Amanda. she was the one

in that school who was most into her faith, and at first I wasn't as close to her,

but one night she convinced me to come to her worship night at her church because

I'm a very musical person. so I went..and I don't think I've ever felt that way in

my life. it was a slow process after that, I began going to her church faith

convenient and going to youth events. after about two months I was playing Christian

music in  my basement one night and I started to think..it wasn't anything special

at all but I broke down into tears. I think I cried for a good solid hour not all at

once but I sat down and prayed and just cried as I prayed, I asked for forgiveness

for everything I had done..I asked god to take my life to carry me on through life

in his glory. of course right away I emailed Amanda thanking her for  everything her

and her family had done for me like driving me to church and keeping me going

because my own family would not take me. I told her that I had found god and how my

life changed that very night.

ever since I have been going to faith covenant, it has been about 7 or 8 months. and

just recently I was at jam a church program and we were at main stage. and I was

sitting next to Sarah and Amanda's brother Chris and I had raised my hands in praise

and the tears just came....I started to cry and I couldn't stop. Sarah grabbed my

had and as I clutched hers we cried together. as we continued to sob during the rest

of the main stage...Chris who was so deep in prayer...reached over and put his hand

on my shoulder as I cried and he prayed....so of course I cried even more.

I never realized it until now...reading this back to myself how much my life was

falling..and how much god turned that around for me. I'm on the phone with Amanda

crying thanking her and her family for the impact they've had on my life. I now find

myself constantly sitting down in praying for at least an hour and I just cry..and

when I'm done..I feel lifted and renewed. my life has forever changed and I will

never be the same person again for the change in my life was so huge...I'm forever

here to worship god because he is now the air I breath..and I will always love him

and praise him everyday even when I have lost my sight and even when I have lost my

voice...I will still praise the lord my god because he is my savoir. I am forever in

his debt.